Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Revenge of the Road Kill

Boys will be boys, especially in groups. An old adage says that the intelligence of a group is equal to the lowest IQ of any member divided by the number in the group. Based on some of the foolish things that my teams and fraternity did involving homemade napalm, condiment mixtures, and various bodily discharges, the old adage is correct. We never did sink to the level of involving road kill in our antics though.

The wrestling team from Carrington, ND High School was on the bus headed to Regional Championships (North Dakota has more than one region?) when the boys discovered what they believed to be a dead raccoon alongside the road at a rest stop. They stowed it in the storage area of the bus. While a lone teen would probably ignore road kill (unless he was really hungry), a group would decide, "Cool, let's gross some people out with this."

Alas, the raccoon wasn't dead and raced through the bus nipping at team members. Ever conscious of transmittable diseases, officials disqualified the Carrington team from the tournament. "Oh, the blood that is now smeared on my opponent came from a bite from a raccoon that we thought was dead and bit me. Let's keep on wrestling." Probably a bad idea.

Sadly, the Carrington boys lost out on the chance for their fourth consecutive Regional Championship. Perhaps, they can get a taxidermist to mount the raccoon that caused all this fuss and place him in the empty spot in their trophy case. This would be a lesson to future grapplers and further proof of the folly of mob mentality.

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