The Evil Scarecrow Bunny

It takes a lot to freak out the family dog. Thunder, the vacuum cleaner, and the fact that his food bowl once again magically filled itself (Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain carrying the kibble) get him excited, but a total canine freak out is a rare occurence.

He experienced one yesterday during our morning walk. It began with the standard sniffing (That husky from up the street peed on this telephone pole, so I must do the same) and searching for chaseable squirrels. Then we encountered something inordinately evil. A neighbor had erected a Rabbit Scarecrow. It stood about six feet high, wore a flowery dress, had a bunny face, and was topped with an Easter Bonnet. Its arms extended parallel to the ground, crucifix-like, and had straw poking out the ends.

The dog freaked out. "OMG, this giant bunny will avenge all the evil I have visited upon his brethren! I must bolt back to my safe spot behind the couch, cower, and whimper."

I freaked out. It brought back memories of the shower scene in "Psycho". I envisioned a knife-wielding anthropomorphic rabbit bursting through the shower curtain to stab me. I pondered racing back to my safe spot cowering under the bed.

Why do I have this fear of human-sized rabbits? It goes back to my first visit to the Easter Bunny. My earlier visit to Santa Claus had gone extremely well. The Jolly Old Elf had come through with the Hopalong Cassidy gunset that I requested. I had a long list of candy requests for the EB. When I sat on his lap I peered into his face and saw that HIS HEAD WASN'T REAL! It was a fine wire mesh with eyes, etc painted on and inside his head was a person. The Easter Bunny had eaten this person and I was probably next! I screamed and bolted for the exit.

I buried the trauma of that day deep in my subconscious until it finally reappeared sixty years later at the sight of the Evil Scarecrow Bunny. Did my panic transfer to my faithful canine companion or did he re-visit his own puppyhood trauma?

We are taking a different route for our walks until Easter is past.