Eclipsing the Sun Belt

The 2010 Census shows once again that America's population is moving south to the Sun Belt. Arizona, Texas, and Florida are gaining population and congressional seats while Pennsylvania, Ohio, and New York are losing people and political pull.

Logical reasons include the decline of manufacturing in the Rust Belt, lower taxes particularly for retirees in Florida and Texas, and the booming Hispanic population down there. I credit somewhat less logical reasons:

Ubiquitous air conditioning. Immigrants from the Great White North can go from their climate-controlled houses to their air-conditioned cars to 70° shopping malls and never break a sweat in 90° temperatures with 95% humidity. It was not always so. In my Army days down South and in my work days on Florida, Arizona, and Texas projects, I would begin sweating when the sun came up and by the time it set, I would look like Michael Phelps after a workout in the pool. Also, those stories about Louisiana mosquitoes the size of small birds are not far off the mark. What is really distressing is getting mosquito bites in January. Fortunately, the modern, hermetically sealed, air-conditioned Sun Belt lifestyle eliminates the carnivorous insect problem as well.

Readily available cold beer. Gas station convenience stores down South sell cold beer for $1 per can and place the suds in individual brown paper bag so you can blithely drive by state troopers while re-hydrating. Try doing that while wrestling with the six pack minimum purchase in Pennsylvania, plus you have to provide your own single can sized bags.

Cowboy hats. If you wear a cowboy hat in the Sun Belt (especially one of those cool severely-creased leather ones), people accept you as a country music fan. "That man looks just like Tim McGraw." If you wear a Stetson north of the Mason-Dixon line, people think that you never outgrew your childhood Hopalong Cassidy fixation. "That man has issues. Better avoid him."

If the Rust Belt states wish to retain their population and political power, they should mandate compulsory air conditioning, allow drivers to freely guzzle beer, and de-stigmatize cowboy hats. The North shall rise again.