Optimism

A recent Time magazine article delved into optimism. Apparently, there is a scientific explanation for why we believe that while things are going straight downhill for the other 6 billion people in the world, our Facebook page will remain full of brilliant accomplishments and insanely good times.

The article included these interesting statistics supposedly showing our unfounded optimism:

10% of Americans expect to live to be 100. In reality, only 0.2% will achieve centenarian status. We know that the odds are slim of reaching 100, but who is going to die first, health-conscious me or that 300 lb woman smoking a cigarette and pounding down a bag of Cheetos and a Slurpee? That's not optimism. It's a fact, Jack.

0% of U.S. marriage license applicants feel they will divorce. Statistically, 55% of marriages terminate in the legal system. This is like asking passengers at the airline boarding gate if they feel that their flight will crash. If we expect a plane crash or a divorce, we don't board the plane or apply for a marriage license. That's not optimism. It is common sense.

93% of Americans believe that they are in the top 50th percentile for driving ability. Actually, I'm surprised that the figure is as low as 93%. Even that little old lady tooling along at 45 mph in the passing lane with her turn signal on and her headlights off thinks that she is a veritable Mario Andretti compared to those idiots passing her on the right. That's not optimism. It's human nature.

It would be interesting to survey the drivers who admit that their ability is not up to snuff. The 7% group is either incredibly modest or a definite hazard on the roads. "I'm not much of a driver because I'm legally blind." "Ever since I hurt my neck, I can't turn my head. Those oncoming drivers really honk their horns at me when I pull out into traffic without looking." "I thought I was a good driver until someone told me that if a stop sign has a white border, it doesn't mean that stopping is optional. I guess that explains some of my accidents."