Prop Bets

Sports Radio provides what we need to know about the Super Bowl.

Patriots Tight End (Isn't that a great term, tight end? It's invariably preceded by the adjective "big" as in "Manning completed that pass to his big tight end". So few of us manage to have an end that is both big and tight with the possible exception of Jennifer Lopez.) Rob Gronkowski was not wearing a walking boot for his high ankle sprain at practice yesterday. Patriots Tackle Matt Light is suffering from stomach flu. And, oh by the way, in less important news, Mitt Romney won the Florida Primary.

Sports Radio also provides us with some of the "proposition bets" for the Super Bowl. After all, not everyone is a football fan, but it is un-American not to watch The Big Game even if all you care about are the commercials, the anthem, and the half-time show. It is also un-American not to bet on something related to the Super Bowl. Las Vegas is offering the following:

The over / under on Kelly Clarkson's rendition of the National Anthem is 1 minute 34 seconds. Whitney Houston warbled for nearly 3 minutes back in 1991. That's a record that may never be topped, but the smart money is taking the over.

Odds are 2:1 that Kelly will forget a word in the Anthem like Christina Aguilera did last year. This is a classic sucker bet. No American under the age of 50 knows all the words to the Anthem. Kelly will probably botch it, but no one will be the wiser.

Odds are 1:4 that Madonna will be blonde for the Halftime Show. There are also odds on pink or black hair color for Ms Ciconne. The smart money is on blonde. Katy Perry seems to change hair color hourly of late, but those of Madonna's generation like Hillary Clinton and Calista Gingrich tend to stick with the blonde.

There are even odds that Madonna will sport fishnet stockings at some point during her performance. This is a judgement call. Are those fishnets on the 53 year old Material Girl or spider veins?

Alas, there are no odds that the NFL will run out of over-the-hill performers for its Super Bowl Halftime Show. Next year's Halftime Extravaganza will star Lawrence Welk and his Champagne Music Makers!