The Dictionary provides us with handy illustrations to go with its definitions. It's one thing to read "Aardvark, noun, a large, burrowing nocturnal African mammal". It is another to see a sketch of what appears to be a cross between an elephant and a pig with the least attractive elements of each dominant. At the other end of the Dictionary, we have "Zygote, noun, a cell formed by the union of two gametes" and a sketch of what appears to be a portion of my paisley undershorts. How did Merriam Webster get into my underwear drawer?
There is no illustration for "Conceit, noun, excessive appreciation of one's own worth or virtue". Future editions of the Dictionary will, no doubt, have a sketch of Donald Trump there.
The Donald is "co-owner" of the Miss Universe Pageant. Upon its completion last Sunday, he commented, "I think this is the most beautiful group of women I've ever seen. In the old days, you got what you got. Now, Trump picks them. It makes a big difference."
You tell 'em, Trumpster! The bad old days of beauty pageant judges picking the winner based on talent, congeniality, and the ability to handle the dreaded personal interview ("If selected Miss Universe, how would you work toward peace with the parallel anti-matter Universe?") are so over. We rely solely on the unerring eye of Trump for pulchritude!
It's not an easy job, but someone has got to attend 84 national pageants around the globe to choose the contestants for the Miss Universe finals. Thankfully, The Donald is up to the task. What a guy!
If this doesn't get a sketch of Donald Trump under "conceit" in the Dictionary, I don't know what will.
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