Death Worms

This was an actual question on Wednesday's "Who Wants To Be a Millionaire":

The Acid-Spitting Mongolian Death Worm is native to which of these locations:

A. The Himalayas

B. The Kalahari Desert

C. The Gobi Desert

D. I'm not sure, but one is crawling up your leg!!!

Mongolian Death Worms, especially the acid-spitting variety, are not among the cuddly, furry friends typically brought into school for Show and Tell. Most Americans are ignorant of their existence. The poor contestant was at a loss for a response and guessed "A. The Himalayas" when, in fact, the critical clue was in the very name of the beast. "Mongolian"equals north of China equals Gobi Desert. QED

"Millionaire" question trickery aside, wouldn't The Acid-Spitting Mongolian Death Worms be the coolest name ever for an athletic team? Lions, and Tigers, and Bears (Oh my!) are so common that they no longer strike fear into opponents' hearts. "Oh, we play the Bears this week. I'm so intimidated."

Let's see how you handle acid being spit into your face while this giant worm (probably resembling Jabba the Hutt of Star Wars fame) crushes you in a Mongolian Death Grip (popularized by the immortal wrestler Gorilla Monsoon, the Manchurian Landslide). Now, there's intimidation! The opposing teams might not even show up for the game.

Big time college programs have live mascots. The Colorado football team is led onto the field by a real buffalo. LSU keeps a caged tiger on its sidelines. That's all well and good, but the Fighting Mongolian Death Worms could surely get George Lucas to create a Jabba the Hutt animatron that would spit acid at the officials after questionable calls. Let's see Ralphie the Buffalo do that!