Nostradamus McCartney

I had two thoughts upon first hearing The Beatles recording of "When I'm 64":

1. What a totally Paul song. John must be throwing up in his mouth that this trite piece of trash is listed as "Lennon - McCartney".

2. That's the extent of excitement at age 64? A Valentine? A bottle of wine? A cottage on the Isle of Wight (if it's not too drear and only if we scrimp and save)? I'm 19 years old now with my whole life ahead of me. By the time I'm 64, I'll be as rich as Hugh Hefner and as daring as James Bond.

I turned 64 yesterday. It turns out that Paul McCartney was a lot more accurate in his prediction of life as a senior citizen than I was 47 years ago. "When I get older losing my hair many years from now." Yup, Paul nailed that one. What Paul missed was that the hair that no longer grows on my sexagenarian scalp now sprouts wildly from my ears and nostrils. "When I get older, ha-hair will grow. In unlikely places" may be true but doesn't fit the meter of the song.

"If I'd been out 'til quarter to three, would you lock the door?" In 1967, I foolishly thought that Paul meant 2:45 AM. That is, after all, the shank of the evening for a 19 year old. The only "quarter to three" that we 64 year olds are likely to see is the one in the afternoon just before our nap time. Of course, we lock the door before our post-lunch snooze. Paul is two for two in his predictions.

"Doing the garden. Digging the weeds. Who could ask for more?" Seriously, Mr McCartney? In 1967, the "more" I would ask for was more booze, more music, and more speed from the family's decrepit car that I had to beg to drive. In 2012, a quiet morning puttering around the yard actually does satisfy. Nostradamus McCartney did it again.