Plaigarism?

Oscar Season is almost upon us. The Producers Guild of America released its top ten nominees for Film of the Year including three that are currently at the local cineplex - "The Descendants", "The Adventures of Tintin", and "The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo". Moviegoers pretty much rejected that list. The top-grossing films for the last week of 2011 were the latest installments of the "Mission Impossible", "Sherlock Holmes" and "Chipmunks" franchises. America was essentially saying, "Don't ask me to think, Hollywood. When I put out my $10 for a ticket, I want something mindless, preferably with characters that I've seen before."

What is a screenwriter to do? What original plots can he devise for Tom Cruise, Robert Downey, Jr. and Alvin in for the upcoming "MI:5", "Sherlock 3", and "Chipmunks 3"? Actually, the scripters for "Mission Impossible:4" solved that dilemma by taking a page from, of all things, professional wrestling.

At the climax of the movie, all appears lost. Tom Cruise is horribly beaten and has a broken leg. It looks like World War III is on the way and it is all the Impossible Mission Team's fault. Then the Bad Guy makes the mistake of mocking Tom and looking away. In that instant, Tom slowly rises despite his infirmities, draws strength from who knows where, overpowers the Bad Guy, undoes his nefarious plot, and we have a happy ending.

This is exactly the plot of a memorable Indian Chief Jay Strongbow wrestling match with Greg "The Hammer" Valentine in 1979. The Chief dominated at the start of the match just like Tom and the MI Team "cruise-d" through any initial difficulties in the movie. Then calamity struck. For the Chief, it was the dreaded "illegal object". The Hammer pulled a steel pipe from beneath the canvas and proceeded to pummel "The Pride of Pohaska, Oklahoma" with it. For Tom Cruise, the Bad Guy blows up the Kremlin, the MI team are the only logical culprits, and a manic chase ensues. Both Jay and Tom put up a brave fight, but the odds were insurmountable.

Strongbow crumpled to the canvas. As The Hammer strutted around the ring, the Warrior Spirit took hold of the Chief. He began a war whoop and a one-legged war dance. Her delivered several tomahawk chops and finished The Hammer off with his patented "bow and arrow stretch".

I've not seen "Mission Impossible 4" and I'm not sure if Tom Cruise invoked his Warrior Spirit, did a war whoop, danced one-legged, and applied his patented "cruise missile smash".

Still, the parallels between the current movie and the 1979 wrestling match are uncanny.

Had the screenwriters for "The Descendants", etc, borrowed a plot line from '70s pro wrestling, their movie might be raking in millions. Best Film Awards are nice and all, but they don't fill seats in the cineplex.