Constructive and Productive

After the alcohol-related death of an undergraduate, Penn State University officials are seeking ways to combat binge drinking. They are publicizing the dangers of alcohol abuse and suspending fraternities that provide booze. These are the standard remedies.

In a unique move, the University plans to offer more Friday classes "to fill students' time with constructive, productive learning activities." One imagines that until now only Monday through Thursday classes were constructive and productive. That'll do it! "I'd really like to play beer pong until I barf my guts up this Friday, but that Economics 101 lecture is so constructive and productive that I don't want to miss it. We're going over the elasticity of demand with price. Will those curves ever intersect?"

Alcohol abuse has caused untold death, destruction, and heartbreak. Use of alcohol should never be encouraged. One wonders why advertising of beer and liquor is allowed.

Still, I think back to my days testing an oxygen system at East St Louis Castings. ESLC manufactured cast iron sewer pipe. Molten iron at more than 2000 degrees was poured into centrifugal casters that spun it into pipe. The temperature on the work floor exceeded 100 degrees. The air was filthy with black dust. The noise level was so high that we communicated by writing on white boards. There was a bar across from the plant entrance. The incoming shift would gather at the bar, down as many beers as they could afford, and then head into what was close to Hell on Earth. What with the heat, they'd sober up in a half hour.

This was one of the very few cases where alcohol consumption allowed constructive and productive activity. You had to be half lit to walk through that plant gate. Presumably, Penn State's proposed Friday classes won't be that bad.